MY ROMANCE WITH TWITTER

When I first got on Twitter, I was enamored with it totally. I spent hours reading other people's Tweets. They were so sexy, so interesting, so smart.

By comparison, mine paled. No doubt because I've been writing non-fiction, health-related books for so long, my sexiness, interestingness and smartness have faded to zero.

Still, I persisted. After all, it was the favored social media for people who held contests for people like me to be favorited by an agent, send them pages from my novel, and ultimately be represented by said agent. One is not sure exactly how long that takes because it's been ions since I started querying, and have not yet Gotten the Call, but that's another story...

Anyway, last week, I began getting messages that I could not post that message. At first, I thought maybe I'd put swear words in it, or been mean to another Twitterer, or some such. But no, I checked my Tweets and they were pristine.

Today, the low blow came.

I was told I could not Follow anyone.

Why not? I'd only followed less than 200 people. Was I on some kind of list I was unaware of for writing thrillers or young adult romance? Maybe my choice of people to follow was bad.Again, I found no problem with the people I'm following. They are all sterling Tweeters.

Then, by some amazing process I've totally forgotten, I discovered a way to send a message to Twitter.

Hurrah!

I filled in the form and pushed SUBMIT. I even received a thank you, but along with that were words something like: You will not receive a response to your question. We only collect this information to make Twitter a more pleasurable experience.

If it were anymore pleasurable, I'd probably die, or at the least, go into a hiccup spell.

Any advice out there? Have you, too, had this horrific experience, and if so, how did you get out of it? Are you still alive, or have you been turned into hot, melting taffy?

I'm holding my breath in anticipation of your sterling suggestions.